Me, My Partner and Guilt – a Difficult Threesum

I want to start this post by saying I am ridiculously in love with my boyfriend of almost four years and he is the greatest rainbow by far that I have in my life. However lately overwhelming feelings of guilt have been impacting my relationship with him. Guilt that stems purely from my illness. Continue reading

I am Thankful for my Illness

We have just passed my six month anniversary of my illness. Typically anniversaries are something to celebrate – so I’ve decided this particular one shouldn’t be any different. I could dwell on the fact that I’m six months into an undiagnosed illness with no signs of a diagnosis anytime soon or I could celebrate all the beautiful things that have come out of this time. I have recently come to the conclusion that overall, I am thankful for my illness. Continue reading

Why I Blog

It was once hinted that my blogs were a form of ‘attention seeking’ by someone close to me and it really hurt me. I then began to think about why the hell I was actually doing it and dedicating most of my time to it. I was determined to prove to myself that my blogs were not me ‘crying for help’ or ‘attention seeking’ but I came to the conclusion that as a matter of fact I do want attention for my blogs but not for selfish reasons at all. Continue reading

A Deeper Insight into my Situation

The doctor once asked me to shade in the affected areas on a piece of paper with an outline of a person on it. A simple task if I were seeing him for an injured ankle or back pain. For my situation this task was quite difficult. Did affected mean just the numbness? What about the pain? The weakness? The terrible cognitive processes? I could have used every colour of the rainbow (pun intended) to demonstrate the different effects on different areas. Continue reading